Coming Clean

Okay. We all saw what happened in today’s meeting. And I’ve had some very loud parties of agents who have been suggesting none too subtly that Harriet and I punish such drastic and potentially dangerous behaviour from a junior member who obviously needs to learn manners, blah blah blah…

All I have to say is this.

Emily, next time you want to pull something like this, COME AND FIND ME BEFORE YOU PUSH SAITO INTO FISH FINGER’S TANK SO I CAN HELP YOU HOLD HIM DOWN!

Too bad Fish Finger has decided she doesn’t like the taste of humans…

Things have been pretty quiet. Combee chewed up the Deus Ex Machina a while ago and Emily has only just started fixing it. The good news is that now we can understand the Pokemon without overdosing on Oneshots. Unfortunately it also means that all Combee’s singing is now perfectly audible and understandable. And then two days ago, she gave me the fateful news…

“Auntie Tashy! I’ve found a Bee who sings! His name is Justin!”

And all hope was lost in the world as the strains of “Boyfriend” began to filter through the Library…

Gods help us all.

Anyway, the WARGS organised a huge game of Risk two weeks ago (Alice won). And then there was a massive Magic The Gathering tournament (which Dave won). And then a Minecraft Survival Games event (Michael won that). And then a friggin huge Pokemon tournament (Adrian won that). Harriet organised a cricket tournament (she won that). And then Ben, John and I had a huge dance off yesterday (nobody won that). We’ve been pretty competitive overall. Maybe its the Olympics.

Anyway, I may as well get out with it. I’ve been feeling pretty morose lately, as most of you may have gathered. Combination of a lot of things I’ve been called regularly over the last few months by various people just digging at me a little deeper each time – mostly insults from Sues, but sometimes other agents. Sometimes just downright nasty. I mean, they’re all true. I’m not blind to my own personality faults, its just that I don’t care what people think of me. The world can think I’m an angry, callous, stupid bitch and I don’t care. Or rather I shouldn’t care. That’s my problem. I’ve started caring again.

I shouldn’t care what other people think of me. I should just be able to say, ‘this is who I am – if you don’t like it, you can fuck off’. But there’s this really rubbish, doormat part of me that just wants to cower and go back to sucking up to the people who insult me in order to get them to like me again. Its pathetic, and I hate myself for it. I thought I’d grown out of that once I left school.

Or maybe I’m just sick and tired of trying to please some people when they just can’t be pleased.

Jeeze, when did I become so angsty? Maybe about the time missions started trickling in more and more slowly? Maybe I need a distraction…in fact I’m really tempted to go pick a fight with a Sue just to stir things up. I’d take Emily with me, but she’s on basement duty this week…

…spoke too soon. That’s the basement alarm going off. Maybe Emily ran out of tea again…

Theory

Yes I’m alive! Adrian has not chained me to my bed!…yet…

Yeah…everyone knows how I’ve been feeling this past week, so no explanation necessary…well maybe just a tiny one…

IlovehimIlovehimIlovehimIlovehimIlovehimIlovehimIlovehimIlovehimIlovehimIlovehimIlovehimIlovehimIlovehim!

…

I love him!

So. Damn. Much…

And I’ve missed him.

So. Damn. Much!

Y’know what, this thing is useless for describing just how happy I am! I just can’t put it into words!

Anyway… what I can put into words is a theory I have. Aster’s missing postcard. I sat down most of this morning on monitor duty thinking of it. I think Aster has a secret admirer and they’ve taken the card! She’ll get it back soon with a love confession written on the back, signed anonymously! And then we’ll all be sitting and wondering who sent it, and we’ll have a romance mystery on our hands! It’ll be awesome!

And to all girls – I’m planning a girly night out! Clubbing, drinks (virgin ones for me ^^) and dancing. Let me know if you’re interested! I’ve also got special plans for us the day before Halloween, so don’t plot anything! Your leader has a cunning plan, and it involves a slumber party…

Want me to spell it out for you?

No thank you!.

I don’t want to go on missions, Librarian duties, or grocery shops! I just want to curl up in bed with Magic Cuddle Kitty, soothing music and my industrial strength painkillers!

God was definitely a man…

Aramayis, I’m sorry I threw my glass at you when you came in my room, but this book has been buried in the Valley of the Kings since the fifteenth dynasty. It can wait three more days!

And Saito? Yes, it can be this bad. In fact, if I took your balls and jammed them repeatedly in the doorframe for a few hours, you may start to understand just how bad it can be!

Kuroneko, thanks for sticking up for me. I owe you.

And in the future guys, don’t hold private conversations outside my bedroom door. I can hear every word.

I shall emerge from my room at lunch time. In the mean time, Michael go into my Filing Cabinet of No Return, and get one of those stakes from the bottom drawer. Pile all my paperwork up and stab one of those through it all. That wood is sealed with an Anti Breeding Spell, so that should keep them at bay for a few hours.

Also Aster, there are at least five sacks of brown rice in kitchen one, and I’m sure Rhia can order in another ten for your ransom. I haven’t had a ransom note for Bakura yet 😦 I miss my psychotic plushie…

See you all at lunch.

Cannot take this any longer!

Alright, that is it! I’ve had enough!

I’m trying to meditate, in my room, have some calm time to myself, and what do I get? The Little Plastic Green Beret abseiling into my room via the ventilation, telling me that they’re setting up a tactical ambush against Shirley, or something of the sort, and that they’re commandeering this space as their vantage point. And I have no say in the matter, and because I’m a ‘civillian’ in this war, I must immediately vacate the premises. And then when Shirley comes trotting down the corridor, they blew my door off to ambush her!

Tomorrow at three o clock (GMT) is our midweekly meeting. Jared, you are to bring the LPGB. Ben, you are to bring Shirley (I don’t care if you have to drag her, or what she does to your eyes, you get her to that meeting!). Neither party is to bring arms! We are sitting down and we are going to come to some kind of truce between both parties. If we cannot agree to something, someone is going to have to go, and with all the trouble they’ve caused, I’m more inclined to get rid of the LPGB. I am sorry to everyone who thinks I’m being unreasonable, but the trouble this little war of theirs is causing is more unreasonable than me.

Three o clock (GMT). Briefing room. Anyone who fails to turn up will be given the dubious honour of being Phoenixia’s sex slave for a month.

Bath/shower/thief king thief

PHOENIXIA! You owe me Lush products! And you owe me them now! I want my Happy Hippy back, or a replacement bottle on my shelf by the end of the day! Same goes for my American Cream, and Daddy-O. You may keep the Flying Fox. It suits you better. But I want the rest back or replaced!

Okay…deep cleansing breaths…

I wonder if Rhia-chan has any of her heavenly potato soup left…

NO ONE TOUCH MY LAPTOP TILL I GET BACK!

…

Mmm…that woman is a saint…

The reason for my mood (aside from being without shampoo, shower gel and conditioner) is that someone has nicked my Thief King Bakura plushie. I have no clue who has nicked him, but I know he’s been nicked, because I definitely left him in my room on top of my bed, next to Magic Cuddle Kitty. And now he’s gone. I would suspect Aster, but I know she isn’t that much a fan of the series. Next suspect was Marcus, but I know he prefers good Bakura over evil Bakura, so that doesn’t make sense either.

Whoever’s got him, please return him? I miss him.

Its British Time

The one thing that has always annoyed me about living in the Library, is that everyone goes to bed at different times. So you always wake up and find that you’ve missed something important. Sometimes I really wish everyone would just stick to GMT and have done with it. At least in the UK you always know what the time is, unlike America, where it can be just about anything.

So I go to bed last night, wake up, and find that while I was sleeping, the agents who were still awake decided to set up a blog for us. Why is it that the Librarian and Society leader is always the last to know about these things? Maybe in the future I should have Phoenixia wake me whenever something like this happens.

…actually, that’s a very bad idea. I remember what she did last time…

Well lets see…parole has been sorted for the day, and I only got spat at once. But Roxelana kept staring at me, without blinking the whole time I was down in the basement. Even when I threatened to jam a paintbrush in her eyes she just giggled at me. Even the other Sues are scared of her, and that’s saying something. I need to rewrite the basement duty schedule so that Rhia can skip it for the next few months. Its dark down there, and I’m not putting her anywhere near that bitch of a Sue. Might put Tyler down there. He tried to eat the badges off my hat, and I’m still pissed at him.

I’ve snapped at a few of the male agents over this last week. PMSing I believe. I’m not the only one though. It seems most of the girls here have synced up after living together for so long. I’m amazed the boy’s haven’t learned to register the signs yet, and started barricading themselves into one room for a week until the crisis is over.

…

Whoever set that explosion off, they’ve just ruptured the water pipe above my ceiling, and soaked my cosplay.

Wonder if Hati will loan me her cricket bat…